Saturday, March 22, 2014

Hermes Store Employee Roster - Part 1 of 6

The Incurable Romantic

  • Gender: Male

  • Sexual Preference: queer as a three-dollar bill

  • Age: 21-60

  • Hair: very Vidal Sassoon

  • Teeth: highway reflective strip white

  • Motto: "Appearance is everything"

  • Percentage in Hermès Captivity: 10-15%

  • Likelihood of Birkin Purchase: almost 100%

  • Previous Job: Gucci

  • The Lowdown: this employee outwardly pretends to enjoy his job but is really just hoping to meet Mr. Right (a knight in a shining Hermès croc bomber jacket) and be saved from salesperson serfdom forever

    Male Approach: flirtatious without blowing kisses, create false sense of dating potential. Flash croc agenda book (more subtle than flashing black Amex card) early in encounter to activate his innate gold-digging instincts. In case of extreme desperation (yours, not his) bait him with promise of after-work martinis at local Grand Hotel.

    Female approach: flirt a little too, but better off to compliment his acute sense of style sense, and talk about some hot guy in the store. Also insinuate you have a rich gay cousin you can set him up with. 



     

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REVIEWS

NBC-TV/Today Show
Summer Reading Round-Up


Bringing Home the Birkin
top 10 summer reads!

WATCH THE VIDEO:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/24775399#24775399

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NEW YORK TIMES
SUNDAY BOOK REVIEW

May 18, 2008
Bag Man
By CHRISTINE MUHLKE

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/18/books/review/Muhlke-t.html?_r=2&scp=1&sq=michael%20tonello&st=cse&oref=slogin&oref=slogin

ONE STOP MEDIA / PRESS SHOP:

CBS / THE EARLY SHOW

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=4044433n

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NEW ENGLAND CABLE NEWS
http://www.necn.com/Boston/Arts-Entertainment/Hes-got-the-book-on-Birkin-bags/1209994267.html

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BOSTON GLOBE

http://www.boston.com/lifestyle/fashion/articles/2008/04/17/bag_man/
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PUBLISHERS WEEKLY


http://www.publishersweekly.com/article/CA6547849.html?q=%22michael+tonello%22
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USA TODAY

http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/fashion/2008-04-21-birkin-side_N.htm

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